Sexual relations, or matters that touch on the area below the waist, as Japanese say had better be left unsaid and so on. However, people obsessed by sexuality often complain that sex is a perverse little devil, and that the moment you ignore it, it has a serious temper tantrum and tries every trick in the book to get your attention; unless of course, according to them, you suffer from sex sickness – or that you are sick of sex!
What Is The Relationship Between Love And Sex – Are They Pretending To Be Conjoined Twins?
To be sure, sexual afflictions come to us in different forms. Sexual stirrings seem to have an inordinate influence over our lives – not necessarily in the expression of the act itself, but in the yearning, scheming, talking about, and even the ruing of it. Yet despite all these, the forces that drive us sexually remain some of the most baffling aspects of our lives.
Why in the midst of a perfect, happy and satisfying relationship do we sometimes get an incredibly strong urge to be unfaithful? The natural relationship that occurs between a man and a woman is bounded together by love. There is a strong relationship between love and sexual instincts. Since men and women belong to the same species, the satisfaction of an instinct can only be realized if both are present and in the mood.
At this juncture of their meeting together, both become attracted to each other, then they both fall in love, This love (whether a fake or true one), engenders a sexual arousal that begins to behave like that naughty child who wouldn’t let it’s parents go to sleep, simply because it can’t fall asleep. In such a scenario, both parents will be required to appease the “child” to make it fall asleep.
Now, a right approach must be taken in the form of caressing, rocking and feeding it with breast milk. Whether the “child” would finally be appeased depends upon the type of antidote administered. This analogy applies to the relationship between love and sex. Take for instance, love to be the “parents” and sexual instincts to be the “child”. Therefore, in any romantic relationship, love must precede sex. And sex must be the naughty child who wouldn’t sleep until it gets its way.
It will be considered abnormal if sex precedes love. Love and sex cannot be said to be conjoined twins. It doesn’t mean every love affair must lead to sex. Or that where sexual relations occur, then love must follow soon after that encounter. After all, how many men and women go to bed every night with people they don’t love? How about the pedophiles and the rapists? Do they necessarily love their victims before engaging in sex with them?
Is My Girlfriend Considered A Lover Or A Sex Partner?
As a true love advocate, this writer would consider your girlfriend as a sex partner and not a lover. To be sure, there are millions of men and women today who only have sex partners and not lovers. How do we say of a man, who would say to a woman ” I love you”, would be ready to “shack up” with her, but would not contemplate marriage – even if she remains the only woman on earth? The same could be said of a woman too.
The meaning of I love you has turned into I need you. In other words, I love you have now acquired the ostensible meaning of I need you to satisfy my sexual cravings. However, different people could have their own definition of what is true love. To this writer, humanity has seriously ruptured the true meaning of love. For love to be described as true love, it must be authenticated by marriage. In any romantic relationship, partners will have to decide which of the following combinations better suits them.
We love each other, let’s get married before having sex.
Let’s have sex first, then If we come to love each other enough, then we get married after that.
Let’s get married first. Love will follow naturally, then we can have regular and unimpeded sex.
Let’s first of all get married. We will then have sex as a concomitant. Then love will come naturally later.
Let’s just love each other and continue to have sex. No any discussion about marriage.
With all these possible scenarios discussed, it will be up to the reader to see what suits them.
How Can I Please My Wife In Bed If She Won’t Talk To Me?
You are considerate in thinking of pleasing your wife in bed. But it’s so sad that she is unwilling to discuss that with you. The truth is that, part of being an adult is accepting responsibility for your sexual pleasure. What your wife should understand is that, it’s her job to tell you what her needs are. After all, different bodies have different triggers and different preferences. Of paramount importance to married couples is the continuation of love between them.
Love is like a flower that needs to be watered constantly, The “water” for this flower should be flirting with each other. Or engaging each other in amorous dalliance. It’s tyrannical indeed to have sexual relationship with your wife to the exclusion of any foreplay. Different women would likely have different erogenous zones in their bodies. And it will only be through constant communication and openness that you will both learn about each other.
Erogenous zones like:
- The Ears. By gently touching and caressing them.
- The lips. By sucking them dry.
- The neck. By gently touching them and moving your hands horizontally up and down while squeezing them lightly.
- Breasts. By sucking them like a three-month-old baby.
- The butt. By gently rubbing it’s contours with your hands.
- The inner thighs. By painlessly moving your hands vertically or horizontally over them with great skill.
- The vagina. One of the ways you blow your woman’s mind is if you know how to touch her vagina professionally. I bet if you learn to do it well, you would have her looking forward to relive the experience with you over and over again! Make no mistake! Learning how to touch or finger your woman’s vagina can help improve your sexual repertoire. With the right type of stimulation, you can help her reach orgasm just by using your fingers and hands.
But in all, knowing what your woman wants is the beginning of taking her to that sexual Eldorado. All you need to do is just ask. She should also be in the mood to open up about these things. She isn’t a robot after all.
Sex is not a thing to be ashamed of, or to be treated lightly, or to be indulged to excess. It’s as solemn a fact as anything is, in life.
Feel free to leave your comments and let us know which love, sex and marriage combination you most likely would prefer.