What Is The Meaning Of Love – The Islamic Conception

To begin with, The Qur’an, the Holy Book of the Muslims which was revealed to the unlettered Prophet Muhammad ( peace be upon him) hinted more than fourteen hundred years ago the intensity of love existing between ants. The twenty-seventh chapter of the Holy Qur’an, called Surah An- Naml (The chapter of The Ants), gives us a clue as to what the meaning of love is from an Islamic viewpoint. In this chapter, and in verse 18, we read the following:

“At length, when they came

To a valley of ants,

One of the ants said:

‘O ye ants, get into

Your habitations, lest Sulaiman (Solomon)

And his hosts crush you

(under foot) without knowing it. (Qur’an, 27:18)

Love Lessons From The Ants

The ant, to outward appearance is a very small and humble creature. In the great pomp and circumstances of the world of lovers, she (generic feminine in Arabic), may be neglected or even trampled upon by lovers who mean no harm. Yet, by her sincere love and wisdom, she carries on her own life full of love within her own sphere (habitations), with unalloyed enthusiasm. From this we learn that,

  • For love to occur between two people they both have to be present.
  • Lovers have to live within the same vicinity or surroundings.
  • They also have to care for each other – removing each other from harms’s way.
  • They have to be forgiving and considerate to each other – as well as to others. One of the ants said – ” O ye ants, get into your habitations, lest Solomon and his hosts crush you without knowing“.

The biological and physical facts of the universe could not have been known before modern technological break-through. How could Muhammad (peace be upon him), an unlettered Prophet describe what goes on between ants? It’s rather so unfortunate that many true lovers are unaware of the intense love between ants and, as such treat their partners as if they were chattels. The rising divorce rate around the world in general, and in many Muslim countries in particular, are unacceptable – and stands as a betrayal of the teachings of their Holy Book, The Holy Qur’an.

Beware of people who would tell you after having fallen head over heels in love: ” I love you more than the love ants have for one another. ” This expression of love could be a hyperbole – indeed, it could just turn out to be a meretricious expression with no real feelings behind it. Their expression of love must be shown in words and in deeds. It has been recently found out by scientist that every interaction between ants springs forth from their lofty and very sincere love for each other. In effect ants have a love for each other that can’t be found by any other creature on earth.

An Eloquent Description Of True Love

Now what is the meaning of love actually? The Muslims learned the true meaning of love through Qur’anic verses like this:

“…They are your garments

And ye are their garments…” (Qur’an, 2:187)

This is an eloquent definition of true love. The fabric used in making this “garment” is love. According to this definition of love, men and women (in love) are each other’s “garments”. In love, there is mutual support; in love there is mutual comfort; in love there is mutual protection. Lovers fitting into each other as a garment fits the body.

Let’s bear in mind that the garments mentioned above are supposed to be custom-made. They are to be made as the buyer specifies. To be sure, you would not purchase a garment you don’t like. You would also not become the “garment” for someone you don’t love. This is a clear indictment against those Muslims who would force their young girls to marry men they would otherwise not consider as bedfellows. There should never be a marriage that is devoid of mutual love. Much to this writer’s indignation, this practice is still prevalent in some Muslim communities in Africa (and even in some parts of the Middle East and South Asia).

The Prophet of Islam. Muhammad (peace be upon him) made a famous description about love when he said:

” We have not seen anything better for lovers other than marriage.” (related by Ibn Majah).

This means that, every romantic relationship should end in marriage. In other words, marriage is what is to found at the top of the “love mountain”. Therefore, according to Islam, love is said to be deficient if either (or both of the lovers) aren’t interested in tying the knot.

God Is The Source Of Every Love

In accordance with Muslim belief, the source of all love is the only true God. The God of Islam is neither remote nor abstract. He is the Real Lord of the universe, whose love swells the hearts and intoxicates the souls. Those who seek Him do not have to depend on the vicarious conviction of the priest, or the arguments in the books to assure them that He exists. They can feel His existence in themselves, as well as in both animate and inanimate objects around them. This is not the prerogative of the “spiritualists”. Any layman who follows His guidance and seeks his presence will find Him close to themselves.

In Islam, lovers find a God who responds to their call. But how did the Muslims get to know God – the true source of every conceivable love? It was through the chain of Prophets, starting with Adam – who was the first true lover to his wife – Eve, and ended with Muhammad – God’s final messenger to all mankind. Some prominent prophets who came between Adam and Muhammad were Nuh (Noah), Ibrahim (Abraham), Musa (Moses) and Isa (Jesus), God’s peace and mercy be upon them all. These prophets were all humans, they ate, slept and had wives (except Jesus), who will marry at his second coming. These great prophets were all true lovers.

How Is God Connected To Love and Mercy?

Someone might ask: How is God connected to love? And how is He the source of every love? The answer is provided in the following Qur’anic verse:

” And among His signs

Is this, which He created

For you mates from among

Yourselves, that ye may

Dwell in tranquility with them,

And He has put love and Mercy

Between your (hearts): Verily

In those are signs for those who reflect.” (Qur’an, 30:21)

If God has put love and mercy between our hearts, then He is the source of every love and mercy that we can conceive of. It also means that God is the owner of both love and mercy. This is true because, you can’t give out something you don’t own. You have to own it first before giving it out to someone else.

In The Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful

True Love Is Based Upon Kindness And Friendliness

The type of love and mercy stated above should be based on truth. It has to settle in the innermost core of the hearts. It has to generate a longing for one another. It is that sort of love that has fallen upon the soul, the senses, the entire body. In this manner, lovers find in each other, a peace of mind, a reassurance, and a deep-rooted sense of security.

With God in mind, the love between lovers continue to grow every day – defying time and place. It indeed compares favorably with a waterfall whose water increase – rather than decreases – all because this is a type of love that has been built upon the purity of purpose – not upon deception by sophistry – but directly connected to God.

 

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What Is The Meaning Of True Love – A Paradigm Shift

If true love is to be understood as a derivative of our shared consciousness; our common experiences; the small things we all know about love; the characters in our stories; the morals those stories carry about love; then true love is what we absorb as we grow up; that type of love we see and hear so often that we call it the only form of love. Out of true love comes behavior. True love could also be derived from the land, tools, materials, family; neighbors and nature. In most parts of the world, our leanings towards true love are still more powerful than our leanings toward fake love. It’s for this reason that true love is pure and endures forever – no matter the circumstances – as opposed to fake love that is alluring but fades away quickly.

True Love Wears No Makeup But It’s Alluring Perfume Makes It Smell Like Heaven

  • True love is priceless. It’s that type of love that has attained a considerable degree of maturity.
  • True love is priceless and the size of the wedding cake or the cost of the wedding ring pales in comparison.
  • True love is unshackled. It’s like the robin that just caught the first worm in Spring.
  • True love is the type of love that surrenders itself in marriage. It is susceptible to renewal, and it grows.
  • True love is like the soil. It is being cultivated carefully so that seeds planted into it will grow effortlessly.

  • True love opposes every obstacle, with perseverance, patience and a soothing language.
  • True love is when the prevailing ambiance between two couples is nothing but mutual affection and magnanimity.
  • True love is overwhelming and it is that type of love you find yourself incapable of walking away from.

True Love Described As A Camel

A Camel’s mouth has a thick leathery lining, allowing it to chew thorny desert plants- without getting hurt – just like true love, it is able to “chew” the thorny issues within a relationship and still remains committed.

  • Camels have large feet that helps them to walk on sand without sinking in. Unlike fake love, true love makes  couples walk on the hot desert sand without sinking. In a true love relationship, couples are able to cut through complex issues that exist within the relationship and forge consensus.
  • Camels have nostrils that can open and close to keep out blowing sand. Just like true love. It shuts out the blowing and invading winds of fake love  that may come to destroy the relationships. In other words, a true lover wouldn’t accept a fake lover. A true lover identifies and keeps a distance away from fake lovers.
  • Camels have three eyelids and two rows of long eye lashes that protect their eyes from blowing sand.  And true love has the same “three eyelids and two rows of long eyelashes” that protect it from the blowing sand of  fake love.
  • Camels store fat in their hump, not water. True love stores affection, tenderness, compassion and genuineness – not hatred, ruthlessness, indifference and ostentation.

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Free Short Love Stories – At The Dinner Table 2

A Once Resolute Woman Was Now Looking Pathetic

What was unusual about Alyssa’s Mom’s is her now pathetic mood. Alyssa and her siblings had grown to recognize their Mom as a firm and resolute woman who was always as steadfast as an Old Testament Prophet in facing adversities. She was that kind of woman who cared mostly about the quality of a cup at the expense of what it contained. Her introspective examination of her motives led her to conclude that she must have been at fault in the type of men she chose to fall in love with. She used that opportunity to educate her three daughters—Mia, Jessica and Alyssa about how they should conduct their love lives. She now wanted to make sure that none of them would repeat the mistakes she had done.

As their Mom sat up, supporting her back with the creamed colored backrest of her arm chair, and supporting her body with the two orange pillows placed on both sides of the seat cushion, she placed her arms on the armrest cushion and looked straight into Alyssa’s eyes. By this time the living room had now acquired a dark, hushed mood, full of the silence of several years of guilt. Tightening her face into the mask of an ex-convict, and, as if fortifying her self to tell Alyssa what she’d held back from her for the past 25 years, she said—with teary eyes:

Alyssa’s Mom Asking For Forgiveness

“Alyssa. I ask for your forgiveness. I do believe in God’s forgiveness after you’d forgiven me.”

“Mom, I’m not a priest…what’s going on?” Alyssa cried out.

Slowly, and painfully, her Mom begun to tell her story:

“To some degree or another, most of us carry life-long regrets for words once spoken in haste, or behavior that might have damaged relationships. Before we pass away, we deserve the time to express ourselves and find release from these inner demons. There are people to whom we may want to express, with or without words—our deep feelings of affection, appreciation and apology… as living beings, we are not allowed to know how our time on earth may slip away…”


“Mom, what’s all that for?” Alyssa cried out impatiently while her other two siblings looked, Isabella and Mia looked perplexed.

“I’d met your Dad when we were both in jail—that was medieval at best –with little food, few beds, no activities, not even electricity. Some inmates had stayed beyond their sentences simply because there was no money to send them home.

He’d been accused of a crime he never committed. Being a foreigner, he had no any recourse to the law…”

“Mom, are you saying you and Dad had been together in the can before?” Alyssa asks.

“Yes.”

“And you never mentioned it to us?”

“Alyssa, I was terribly afraid of the consequences”

“Damn the consequences, I want to know the truth right now.” Alyssa insisted. her two other siblings were getting more confounded.

“What had been your crime Mom?”

“Alyssa, spare me these questions, you are not a judge!”

“I’d committed no crime…”

“And you were in jail?”

“It was a set up…yes, a set up by a man I was deeply in love with…that Chinese man – who I never got to marry.”

She Opens Up On Her Failed Romantic Life

Alyssa’s Mom retreated into a long silence. Those few words of their Mom had a narcotic effect on Alyssa in particular, and before she could say anything else, Alyssa nodded away in sleep.

Her emotional story was very cathartic—recounting it actually allowed her to release buried emotions. As tears continued to flow down her bony cheeks in alarming quantity, she lamented her decision twenty-five years ago to have agreed to marry a man she met in jail—Alyssa’s Dad. She now says it was her marriage to that man that altered her love life forever. She was actually seeking forgiveness from her three daughters—for having allowed her self to be used and dumped by one man after another. Each of her three kids had different fathers who had all walked away from her. Had she adhered to the lessons taught to them by Grandma at the dinner table, she wouldn’t have had to regret over the past and wished it hadn’t happened.

Ayssa’s Mom continued:

“Yes. I have made many romantic connections with men. I have also lost many of those connections. I have even had a date ask me if it was cool to get another woman’s number while we were out camping.

All of these experiences didn’t help me grow. Alyssa’s Mom confesses.

“But almost nothing had contributed to my low esteem and failure in romance like when I didn’t know it was time for me to walk away from a man that I knew wasn’t right until it was too late – when I was either dumped or got pregnant and kicked out. Alyssa’s recounts with bitterness.

Turning to her three daughters she asked with a guttural voice:

“You girls, tell me, when was the last time you chose to willingly end a relationship with a guy you were attracted to?”

Alyssa’s Mom continued:

” I would do everything in your power to “win” mens over. I would chase endlessly, pretend to be a friend for months or years, disrespect my own precious time, and even let myself get walked over — all because I couldn’t let go of this one man – until it was rather too late! I wished that you all shared the same biological father.

Then Alyssa’s Mom drops the bombshell:

“Alyssa, I have been asking for forgiveness from you because, during your pregnancy, I made several attempts to abort it. I hated your Dad so much. When that wasn’t successful, I then attempted to end my life and that of yours by committing suicide. I knew it was wrong, but I didn’t care. But God (with His unlimited mercy) saved the both of us.

Looking back, guilt and pain have now become terrible exchanges for Alyssa’s Mom for several wasted years of failed romance!

Conclusion

What had been bothering Alyssa and her siblings after their Mom’s unusual confessing was that, why all the emphasis on how women should conduct their romantic lives? Does it mean men don’t also make mistakes in the quest for love? Why was she blaming her self for all that happened to her love life and not the men who had also contributed to her plight? Does this mean that whenever love fails, women should take the blame?

Or that, it is only mothers who always have to seek forgiveness from their children whenever they realize they are at the wrong side of love and pregnancy occurs and a life is brought to the world? Why should women be more circumspect when it comes to choosing a man than men? Does it mean that women are always at the short end of the love stick?

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I sat up, supported my back with the creamed colored wall beside the bed, and looked straight into Mama’s eyes. The room acquired a dark, hushed mood, full of the silence of several years of guilt. Tightening her face into the mask of an ex-convict, and, as if fortifying her self to tell me what she’d held back from me for the past 24 years, she said—with teary eyes:

“Ayoma. I ask for your forgiveness. I do believe in God’s forgiveness after you’d forgiven me.”

“Mama, I’m not a priest…what’s going on?” I cried out.

Slowly, and painfully, Mama begun to tell her story:

“To some degree or another, most of us carry life-long regrets for words once spoken in haste, or behavior that might have damaged relationships. Before we pass away, we deserve the time to express ourselves and find release from these inner demons. There are people to whom we may want to express, with or without words—our deep feelings of affection, appreciation and apology… as living beings, we are not allowed to know how our time on earth may slip away…”

“Mama, what’s all that for?” I cried out impatiently.

“I’d met your Dad when we were both in jail—that was medieval at best –with little food, few beds, no activities, not even electricity. Some inmates had stayed beyond their sentences simply because there was no money to send them home.

 

“You mean Mia’ss Dad?”

 

 

 

 

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Free Short Love Stories – At The Dinner Table

On An Unusually Cold Evening In Winter

Alyssa recollects how, one day, her Mom brought her and her other two siblings, Mia and Jessica together for a chat. She was was the youngest of three. She says It was an unusually cold winter evening, and they had made some log-fire in the living room to keep their bodies warm.

Alyssa’s Mom was actually narrating to them a memorable occasion on her eighteenth birthday – she is now sixty-five! According to her Mom, during one week-end, on her eighteenth birthday, she invited five of her classmates to her home for a sleepover and a party the next day. They were Emma, Emily, Sarah, Nadia and Isabella. Emma was the oldest and Nadia, the youngest.”

Alyssa’s Mom narrated to them that:

After wining and dining until the next day morning, which was a Friday night, her friends and herself went to bed and slept until 5 p.m. the next day. Before they woke up, Alyssa’s Grandma and Grandpa had already prepared dinner and set the table. As they sat around the table eating, one of her Mom’s friends, Emma, giggled nervously when their grandma congratulated her on the costume she was wearing. According Alyssa’s Mom, Nadia was a tall, beautiful and a sixteen-year old, who had already started dating.

Mom Describes Grandpa’s Personality

Alyssa then goes to say that, during their chat in the living room that evening, a wave of nostalgia overtook her Mom, as she tried to recall the halcyon days of her youth. Using her bare hands to wipe out tears dropping freely down her cheeks, she said:

“Your Grandpa had been a very jovial person. He was tall, with wispy brown hair, a face of great benignity set on a gangling body. During his lifetime, he behaved with others with benignity and benevolence. When he was alive, people extended their hands of cooperation toward him. They honored and respected him. They shed tears after his death. He led such an agreeable life that no one had any complaint against him, nor did he cause any harm to anyone during his lifetime. He always attracted others to himself. So since his death fifteen years ago, he has always been remembered in good words. Undoubtedly, a tree that has a thick trunk tends to have many branches.”

Trying to balance her self on the sofa she was sitting on, Alyssa’s Mom continued:

“As Emma, Isabella, Emily, Sarah, Nadia and myself sat around the table eating our dinner, little did we realize it was going to be an unforgettable dinner. Indeed, the mother of all dinners. Your grandparents later joined us on the dinner table”. Pausing for a moment, she continued:

Grandpa Embarrasses Alyssa’s Mom

“Your Grandpa had realized Nadia’s gorgeous costume and said:

“Nadia, who’s that lucky guy in your life?”

“There’s nobody yet.”

“Aren’t you dating at the moment?”

“I used to, but right now, I have stopped.”

“Stopped permanently?”

After a brief silence, and speaking as if a bone had been stuck in her gullet, Nadia answered:

“No, temporarily.”

“I felt uncomfortable and embarrassed all along as your Grandpa continued asking my friend about her private life. I had invited Nadia – the most beautiful among us, and my other four classmates for a sleepover to celebrate my birthday party and nothing else.

After all whether she’d been dating or not was none of your Grandpa’s business. Your Grandpa continued:

“Do you mean you have not given up on men yet?”

“No, not at all. It’s only that I’ve now gotten frustrated because I can’t find the man of my dreams.”

“The man of your dreams?” your Grandpa asked.

“Yes, a smart, handsome, tall, intelligent, well-educated and wealthy man.” Nadia explains.

Turning his attention to my other friend, Emma, who was nineteen, he inquired:

“Are you also in the same dilemma?”

“Of course I am. It seems to me that all the smart guys have died alongside the dinosaur.” Emma asserted.

Alyssa’s Grandma Heads Into The Kitchen

Alyssa’s Mom continues:

A feeling of shock and discouragement engulfed all of us at the table. Your Grandma hadn’t spoken a word until now. I watched in blank dismay as she got up and headed to the kitchen. After a few minutes inside, she returned with a large jar of fresh orange juice. She then went back to the kitchen and later returned with an assortment of cups—porcelain, plastics, some plain-looking and some expensive and exquisite, asking us to help ourselves to fresh orange juice.

When all of us had a cup of fresh orange juice in hand, giving a chuckle of delight,

Your Grandma said:

“If you all notice, all the nice-looking expensive cups have been taken up, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones.”

Your Grandma continued:

“While it is quite normal for you all to want only the best for yourselves, that also serves as a source of your anguish. What all of you really wanted to drink was fresh orange juice, not the cups. However, all of you consciously went for the better cups, and surprisingly enough, you are eyeing each other’s cups!”

Alyssa’s Mom narrates:

Leaning toward Isabella who had been sitting next to her on her right side, Your Grandma said:

“These cups are like the sort of men you young girls have been searching unsuccessfully for. These cups are nothing but tools that contain the fresh orange juice you are all drinking. The quality of the orange juice you put in any other cup, whether a cheap and a plastic one or an exquisite one doesn’t change. What matters is the orange juice—not the cups. Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cups, we fail to enjoy the orange juice in them.”

Alyssa’s Mom continues her narrative:

At once every one of us at the dinner table, including your Grandpa looked pensive. We were all at a lost as to where your Grandma was coming from. None of us seemed to have the slightest idea of what she was trying to say.

The Orange Juice Gives Nourishment – Not The Cups!

Looking straight into Alyssa’s Mom’s eyes, Her Grandma said:

“It’s natural for every young girl at your age to dream of dating the smartest and the most handsome of all men. That’s the reason why all of you chose to drink the orange juice from the most expensive and exquisite cups. I intentionally chose a variety of cups to see what type of cup each of you chooses to have their orange juice. My worst fears were confirmed as I saw all of you going for the more expensive ones. As if that wasn’t enough, I saw how each of you eyed one another’s cup. You were more concerned about the type of cups, their appearances, than the orange juice itself.”

Pausing for a moment, your Grandma continued:

“The orange juice is what would give you nourishment, not the cups. The orange juice is the love that would sustain you and who ever you chooses to date and subsequently marry. You should have rather concentrated on the quality of the orange juice—not the quality of these cups. The cups represent those men you are all aspiring to date, and the orange juice also represent the love you should have been more concerned about.”

Men Are Like Containers Of Love!

Alyssa’s Grandma continued:

“As for the men of your dreams, they act like containers of love. They may only be empty containers. Even though, outwardly they could be pleasant-looking like those cups you all chose. They (men) could even have personalities that can charm animals and confuse plants, but inwardly, their characters will not necessarily be solid. With a grim face, the old lady said: “Now you girls, tell me, what is the use of an exquisite and expensive cup if it can’t contain liquids?”

Alyssa’s Mom said:

“Having said all that, your Grandma kissed the old man on his forehead and left the dining room. For about five minutes none of us uttered a word. We all tried to be stoic about your Grandma’s statements, but as soon as we left the dinner table and returned to my bedroom, we all began to cry and bang our foreheads on the floor. For about ten minutes none of us could look into one another’s face.

We felt so ashamed of ourselves that we just slipped unnoticed through a back door of our house and left. The old lady was right.” Alyssa’s Mom concluded.

Turning to Jessica, the oldest of Alyssa’s sisters, Her Mom said:

“Age has its privileges, not least among them is the opportunity to distill whatever wisdom come from a long life of experience.”

At this point, Alyssa’s Mom then started weeping uncontrollably. Her Mom’s speech was so filled with pathos that there wasn’t a dry eye in the house. At this time the log-fire was getting dimmer and coldness began to set in. It was already mid-night and the neighborhood was becoming quiet. Alyssa could see how, Jessica and her other sibling, Mia tried in vain to calm down their Mom. It seemed to them that she’d regretted for a mistake she did in the past, and was now trying to advise them against falling into the same pit.

Continued Here.

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Love In Islam – Questions And Answers

The word Islam means voluntary “Submission” or “Surrender” to the Will of God. It is derived from the root word “Salaam”, meaning peace.Islam is a natural way of life that encourages one to give due attention to their relationship with God and His creation. Islam teaches that it is through the doing of good deeds and seeking the pleasure of God that souls find true happiness and peace.

According to researchers at the Pew Research Center,

“While the world’s population is projected to grow 32% in the coming decades, the number of Muslims is expected to increase by 70% – from 1.8 billion in 2015 to nearly 3 billion in 2060. In 2015, Muslims made up 24.1% of the global population. Forty-five years later, they are expected to make up more than three-in-ten of the world’s people (31.1%).” Michael Lipka and Conrad Hacket.

Question: How Do Muslims Understand Love?

Let’s open the Holy Qur’an – The Muslim’s Holy Book and read the following verse:

” Fair in the eyes of men

Is the love of things they covet;

Women and sons;

Heaped-up hoards

Of gold and silver; horses

Branded (for blood and excellence);

And (wealth of) cattle

And well-tilled land.

Such are the possessions

Of this world’s life;

But with Allah

Is the best of the goals

(To return to).” Qur’an,3:14.

We realize from the above verse that the pleasures of this world are enumerated: Women for love; sons for strength and pride; hoarded riches, that procure all luxuries; the best and finest pedigree of horses; cattle, the measure of wealth in the ancient world (and even during the present era); as well as the means of and symbol of good farming in the modern world;  broad acres of well-tilled land; and finally, the heaped-up hoards of gold and silver.

What we notice immediately after reading this verse is the relationship that occurs between a man and a woman. That relationship is bonded together by love – not by coercion. God has preceded all other things that are coveted by men in this life with the love for women ( this appeals to men the most). We also realize from this verse that the love that occurs actually has to occur between a man and a woman – not between a man and another man. God has even preceded the love for sons with the love of women; the love of wealth; and all that men regard as sources of power that they want to take exclusive possession of .

From this verse, we notice the strong relationship between love and sexual instincts.

Question: How Does Islam Regulate The Powerful Relationship Between Love And Sexual Instincts?

Islam does not base the knowledge of vice and virtue on mere intellect, desire, intuition, or experience derived through the sense organs – which constantly undergo shifts, modifications and alterations; and do not provide definite, categorical and unchanging standards of morality. Rather, it provides us with a definite source – the Divine Revelation as embodied in the Holy Qur’an and the Sunnah, the way of life of the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him). These sources provide a standard or moral conduct that is permanent and universal and holds good in every age and under any circumstance.

According to Islam, making love to one’s wife is considered an act of worship and therefore rewarded by God. In the light of that the powerful relationship that exists between love and sex has to be regulated in order for it to attain the status of worship.

The Prophet of Islam, Muhammad (p.b.u.h) said: “… and in the sexual act of each of you there is charity.” His companions asked: “O Messenger of God, when one of us fulfills his sexual desire will he have some reward from that?” The Prophet answered: ” Do you [not] think that were he to act upon it unlawfully, he would be sinning? Likewise if he has acted upon it  lawfully he would have reward.” (Related by Muslim). What this means is that sexual acts are rewarded if done lawfully and are sinful if done unlawfully.

Al-Masjid an-Nabawi – Medina, Saudi Arabia

Question: What Is The Relationship Between Love And Marriage In Islam?

The Prophet of Islam indicated – albeit in very few words – the relationship between love and marriage in Islam.

” We have not seen anything better for (two) lovers other than marriage.” (Related by Ibn Majah). In other words, the trip of a person traveling on the highway of love should end in the city of marriage. It also means that no love is true love in the eyes of Islam if it falls short of ending in marriage. Islam frowns upon the idea of “playing house” for few months or even few years and later abandoning ship. Love is said to be deficient and (even fake) if it is not authenticated by marriage.

Islam has therefore laid down a safe passage through which romantic partners should take during their trip on the highway of love. This highway isn’t supposed to be serpentine. It’s supposed to be straight and short. This is meant to protect travelers on this highway from falling into potholes. Therefore, according to Islam, it’s imperative that, once the aura of love begin to make rounds between two people belonging to the opposite sex, there is the urgent need to effect a marriage contract.

There is no need to waste time or indulge oneself in reexamining the relationships over and over. This does not mean compelling people to marry others they do not love. The reason is that, at this moment, it’s only the heart that is supposed to take charge – not the head. A man might say: ” I do not know this girl very well, and she doesn’t also know me well too, I intend to get more acquainted with her habits and her lifestyle. I wish to befriend her for a while.” A girl in love might also delay marriage for similar reasons.

I should emphasize here that there is no forced marriage in Islam. Forced marriage occurs when a man or woman is coerced by the family to marry, using threats, emotional blackmail, fraud, and even bribes. Or when it is arranged against the person’s will, without their consent or consent under duress. That is not considered a marriage in the eyes of Islam. It is oppression and abuse. Marriage in Islam requires ijab (proposal) qubul (acceptance). Forcing a woman to marry a man means that there was no qubul – the right of every woman, regardless of her age. Without it the marriage is a sham.

Question: Are Love Marriages Tolerated In Islam?

To be on the safer side, arranged marriages are the cultural norm for many Muslims across the world. Men and women of marriageable age may meet their future spouses through family or friends. Generally speaking, Muslims do not “date” in the popular Western cultural sense. Therefore, many potential romantic couples look to arranged marriages as a means to realize their dreams. The general expectation is that the seed of love has already started to deepen it’s roots within the hearts of the couples involved in an arranged marriage – and (expected) to continue to grow after they have tied the knot. Before any potential romantic partners are considered, families as a unit decide the values and characteristics that they should essentially possess so that they will have a satisfying life together.

The customary period of courtship varies from one culture to another. And also from one family to the other. After an initial introduction, it is required by Islam to grant prospective grooms and brides some chances to meet in private and get to know each other under supervision. Some families encourage the potential couple to go out in public, usually in a group setting. People can be introduced through families, well-meaning community members, matchmaking services, on-line matrimonial sites, through Muslim clerics, teachers and friends with the original goal being marriage. Perhaps a better term for it should be an arranged love marriage.

After a man from the Ansar (translated literally as “helpers”), proposed to a woman and informed the Prophet about it, he asked: “Did you look at her?” His answer was an emphatic “No.” The Prophet then said: Then go and look at her, surely there is something in the eyes of the Ansar. The Ansar were the people who helped the Prophet ( p.b.u.h) after he emigrated to Medina from Mecca. The Prophet (p.b.u.h) also said to Mugheera, the son of Shu’ba (one of his companions), who informed him of his proposal to a certain woman. “Go and look at her, for it’s likely that (through your looking at each other), the feeling of affection and companionship would occur between you.

Conclusion

There is no human being on earth unless he or she has a heart that throbs and two eyes that see. As humans, we all yearn for love, compassion, and affection. Indeed, the human heart is never devoid of an atom of sympathy and mercy. In the same manner, the two eyes cannot also be deprived of looking and appreciating beauty. But it’s the usage of these yearnings that matters. They could be directed towards corrupting the society of reforming it.

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What Is In A Healthy Relationship – An Advice For Couples

Some people always ask: What is in a healthy relationship? They seem not to understand the true ingredients of a love relationship. To them, merely living with someone they say they love is all that it takes. The nature and quality of interactions between lovers indicate the intensity of the existing love between them. In every relationship, the importance of communication between couples cannot be overemphasized. It is through constant communication that trust can be established between couples.

In A Loving Relationship There Is Adequate Communication

The door leading to hatred – the opposite of love – between couples can be slammed if there happens to be adequate communication between them. In human relationships there has always been a thin wall between love and hatred, and the best antidote in expelling doubts that often lead to mutual hatred is communication. Should there happen that there is any disturbance in their relationship, they should endeavor to expel it. the art of dispelling disturbances is workable only if there exist channels of communication between them.

 

Lovers should be able to communicate with each other using a soothing language. If they are unable to address each other using a soothing language, then how will they be able to oppose obstacles threatening their union with patience? In order that the existing love between couples is not trapped in inertia, there is always the need for lovers to develop unique gifts of cutting through complex issues and forging consensus. How will this happen without constant communication between them?

The lack of constant communication in any loving relationship tends to make couples involved to start distancing themselves from each other – until such a time that either of them finds excuses to start being unfaithful. There and then, the love that existed between them turns into a breeze that wafts through their hearts into thin air – as if it never existed. This is what is happening today in this our “Digital Age”. It is happening because couples are so busy that they barely have enough time for each other. To be sure, we are now marrying later than our parents and divorcing faster!

In A Healthy Relationship There Is Mutual Trust

With constant communication comes mutual trust. At a time that there exists trust between loving couples, there is bound to be mutual feeling of affection and tenderness toward each other. If a woman’s trust for her man were intense, she would definitely not hesitate to fulfill her responsibilities toward her man. These so-called responsibilities are of no practical significance – they are merely acts aimed at proving to her man how much she loves and trusts him. A man would also do well to fulfill his part of responsibilities towards his woman in the same manner.

Consider for a moment, what Diana, The People’s Princes had to say about the quality of her interactions with Charles – The Prince Of Wales. ” I threw myself down the stairs bearing in mind I was carrying a child. She said describing one incident (emphasis mine). “Queen Elizabeth comes, absolutely horrified, shaking, she’s so frightened…and Charles went out riding. (emphasis mine). The Princess later died at age 36 in a 1997 auto accident in Paris with her companion, Dodi Al Fayed. In order not to feel imprisoned within any relationship, lovers have to communicate more to build trust between them.

Should there exist mutual trust between couples, their hearts will be fortresses of love that entertains no one else but each other. Each of them would effortlessly reciprocate the love and trust given to them without any hesitation. That could be a win-win situation for the both of them. Where there exists mutual trust, both partners will guard each other’s property jealously during their absence and would not strive to squander it wantonly.

In A Loving Relationship There Is A Need To Keep Promises

As humans we are all leery of people who break their promises. In a loving relationship, effective and open communication between the couples lead to the building of trust. Then comes the hard work of maintaining the trust. The main ingredient in maintaining the trust between couples is to keep promises you both make to each other. If you cannot fulfill a promise why then make it to your partner? And if you make the promise and can no longer keep it, explain it to your partner why you can’t. Do not wait to give excuses after they find out that you have broken a promise or two.

If you promise your partner you are going to have sex all night vs. watching night baseball, fulfill it. If you have a reason that compels you to skip it for another day, let them know about it. It maybe that you have to work on night shifts for some few days at work. Give them a reason not to doubt your excuses.

In A Healthy Relationship There is God-Consciousness

This writer is keenly aware that people who dwell so much on religion are usually considered old-fashioned in today’s “Digital World”. However, If you think religion belongs to the past and that we live in a new age of reason, you need to check out the facts: About eighty-four percent (84%) of the world’s population identifies with a religious group. Members of this demographic are generally younger and produce more children than those who have no religious affiliation. Therefore, the world is getting more religious, not less – although there are significant geographical variations.

According to 2015 figures, Christians form the biggest religious group by some margin, with 2.3 billion adherents or 31.2% of the total world population of 7.3 billion. Next come Muslims (1.8 billion, or 24.1%), Hindus (1.1 billion, or 15.1%) and Buddhists (500 million, or 6.9%). But the third biggest category is missing from the above list. In 2015, 1.2 billion people in the world, or 16%, said they have no religious affiliation at all. This does not mean all those people are committed atheists; some – perhaps most – have a strong sense of spirituality or belief in God, gods or guiding forces, but they don’t identify with or practise an organised religion (Harriet Sherwood, The Guardian, 27 August 2018).

Conclusion

What these statistics mean is that belief in God or a higher power made people better human beings. That is exactly why couples who believe in a higher power can better cope with the stress of living together; keeping an open communication between them; trusting each other and making and fulfilling promises to each other.

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Sexual Relationships – Questions And Answers

Sexual relations, or matters that touch on the area below the waist, as Japanese say had better be left unsaid and so on. However, people obsessed by sexuality often complain that sex is a perverse little devil, and that the moment you ignore it, it has a serious temper tantrum and tries every trick in the book to get your attention; unless of course, according to them, you suffer from sex sickness – or that you are sick of sex!

What Is The Relationship Between Love And Sex – Are They Pretending To Be Conjoined Twins?

To be sure, sexual afflictions come to us in different forms. Sexual stirrings seem to have an inordinate influence over our lives – not necessarily in the expression of the act itself, but in the yearning, scheming, talking about, and even the ruing of it. Yet despite all these, the forces that drive us sexually remain some of the most baffling aspects of our lives.

Why in the midst of a perfect, happy and satisfying relationship do we sometimes get an incredibly strong urge to be unfaithful? The natural relationship that occurs between a man and a woman is bounded together by love. There is a strong relationship between love and sexual instincts. Since men and women belong to the same species, the satisfaction of an  instinct can only be realized if both are present and in the mood.

At this juncture of their meeting together, both become attracted to each other, then they both fall in love, This love (whether a fake or true one), engenders a sexual arousal that begins to behave like that naughty child who wouldn’t let it’s parents go to sleep, simply because it can’t fall asleep. In such a scenario, both parents will be required to appease the “child” to make it fall asleep.

Now, a right approach must be taken in the form of caressing, rocking and feeding it with breast milk. Whether the “child” would finally be appeased depends upon the type of antidote administered. This analogy applies to the relationship between love and sex. Take for instance, love to be the “parents” and sexual instincts to be the “child”. Therefore, in any romantic relationship, love must precede sex. And sex must be the naughty child who wouldn’t sleep until it gets its way.

It will be considered abnormal if sex precedes love. Love and sex cannot be said to be conjoined twins. It doesn’t mean every love affair must lead to sex. Or that where sexual relations occur, then love must follow soon after that encounter. After all, how many men and women go to bed every night with people they don’t love? How about the pedophiles and the rapists? Do they necessarily love their victims before engaging in sex with them?

Is My Girlfriend Considered A Lover Or A Sex Partner?

As a true love advocate, this writer would consider your girlfriend as a sex partner and not a lover. To be sure, there are millions of men and women today who only have sex partners and not lovers. How do we say of a man, who would say to a woman ” I love you”, would be ready to “shack up” with her, but would not contemplate marriage – even if she remains the only woman on earth? The same could be said of a woman too.

The meaning of I love you has turned into I need you. In other words, I love you have now acquired the ostensible meaning of I need you to satisfy my sexual cravings. However, different people could have their own definition of what is true love. To this writer, humanity has seriously ruptured the true meaning of love. For love to be described as true love, it must be authenticated by marriage. In any romantic relationship, partners will have to decide which of the following combinations better suits them.

[A]

  • Love
  • Marriage
  • Sex

We love each other, let’s get married before having sex.

[B]

  • Sex
  • Love
  • Marriage

Let’s have sex first, then If we come to love each other enough, then we get married after that.

[C]

  • Marriage
  • Love
  • Sex

Let’s get married first. Love will follow naturally, then we can have regular and unimpeded sex.

[D]

  • Marriage
  • Sex
  • Love

Let’s first of all get married. We will then have sex as a concomitant. Then love will come naturally later.

[E]

  • Love
  • Sex

Let’s just love each other and continue to have sex. No any discussion about marriage.

With all these possible scenarios discussed, it will be up to the reader to see what suits them.

 

How Can I Please My Wife In Bed If She Won’t Talk To Me?

You are considerate in thinking of pleasing your wife in bed. But it’s so sad that she is unwilling to discuss that with you. The truth is that, part of being an adult is accepting responsibility for your sexual pleasure. What your wife should understand is that, it’s her job to tell you what her needs are. After all, different bodies have different triggers and different preferences. Of paramount importance to married couples is the continuation of love between them.

Love is like a flower that needs to be watered constantly, The “water” for this flower should be flirting with each other. Or engaging each other in amorous dalliance. It’s tyrannical indeed to have sexual relationship with your wife to the exclusion of any foreplay. Different women would likely have different erogenous zones in their bodies. And it will only be through  constant communication and openness that you will both learn about each other.

Erogenous zones like:

  • The Ears. By gently touching and caressing them.
  • The lips. By sucking them dry.
  • The neck. By gently touching them and moving your hands horizontally up and down while squeezing them lightly.
  • Breasts. By sucking them like a three-month-old baby.
  • The butt. By gently rubbing it’s contours with your hands.
  • The inner thighs. By painlessly moving your hands vertically or horizontally over them with great skill.
  • The vagina. One of the ways you blow your woman’s mind is if you know how to touch her vagina professionally. I bet if you learn to do it well, you would have her looking forward to relive the experience with you over and over again! Make no mistake! Learning how to touch or finger your woman’s vagina can help improve your sexual repertoire. With the right type of stimulation, you can help her reach orgasm just by using your fingers and hands.

But in all, knowing what your woman wants is the beginning of taking her to that sexual Eldorado. All you need to do is just ask. She should also be in the mood to open up about these things. She isn’t a robot after all.

Conclusion

Sex is not a thing to be ashamed of, or to be treated lightly, or to be indulged to excess. It’s as solemn a fact as anything is, in life.

Feel free to leave your comments and let us know which love, sex and marriage combination you most likely would prefer.

 

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Free Short Romantic Love Story – Continuation 2

Two Men, One Sandra

As she sits beside the old woman on the floor, trying to help her through her ordeal, she sees a glossy midnight-blue BMW sedan pull up. Without hesitation, two of the nurses inside the emergency ward are rushing out with a stretcher. The lady at the back is quickly put on the stretcher and pushed away into another compartment of the ward. The driver of this sedan didn’t even bother to step out of the car. He drives away immediately. Sandra only heard him telling one of the nurses that “his boss will be talking to their boss later.”

Sandra realize the lady sent away on the stretcher is white. She didn’t even have to register. Moments before her arrival, she did eavesdrop a phone conversation between the chief nurse and someone on the other end:

“Where are they now?” She asked.

“Are they on their way here? She’ll be fine. We’ll accord her the necessary attention that befits a woman of her caliber.” She assures the other person on the phone.

As soon as the officer darted into the restroom to respond to nature’s call, the chief nurse stood up from her chair by the doorway and walked straight to the clerk at the information counter.

“Who’s that man?”

“He’s a police officer.”

“What makes you say that?”

I saw his police badge.” She whispers.

Folding her arms, she says with trepidation: “Then I’m finished.” The officer is coming out of the restroom now. The chief nurse is moving toward him as fear and anxiety gnaws at her heart. She’s now trying to put on a veneer of politeness. Gnashing his teeth in rage, he says:

“Why didn’t you tell us you were a police officer immediately you entered this ward? I would have personally seen to it that your relative was given an express service.” She thought Sandra was the Officer’s relative.

Behaving like a demonstrative toadying dog, she instructs the junior nurses to quickly take Sandra into the observation room on a stretcher. As soon as she was inside of it, she counted about five nurses around her. Each of them tried to make her feel comfortable. All this while, her thoughts were with that old lady who had been left to flounder in a morass of inefficiency and corruption. After being administered a sedative injection, Sandra subsequently fell asleep.

Abudu Walks Into The Emergency Ward Looking For His Love – Sandra

Its now daybreak, Sandra is still in bed. She hears a voice that seems like that of Abudu. She asks herself:

“What has this man got to do with me after having treated me like his pet?”

“Where’s that girl who was admitted here yesterday?” Abudu asks.

“She’s in room 911.”

Sandra hears him shout on top of his voice.

“Do you say room 911?”

“Yes, you heard me alright!”

“Please get that girl out of that room immediately, it’s an evil number.”

“Sir, you cannot come over here and dictate to us what should be done to your relative.” The nurse on duty says.

Abudu never disclosed to them his relationship with Sandra. To the nurses, both Abudu and Sergeant Nelson – the police officer – were related to Sandra.

“Sorry, but…” Abudu apologizes.

“But what?” One nurse asks.

“I’m just worried she’s in room 911.”

“What has the number 911 got to do with you?”

“911 translates into September 11, and it was the day those terrorists killed so many innocent people in New York City. My brother was among the dead.”

“So many other innocent people were also killed, not just your brother alone. By the way, had it been that the events of 911 had taken place in a poor African country, do you think it would have received this massive press coverage?” She says.

The nurse on duty continues,

“You know what? The reason why it attracted such a massive press coverage was not because of the number of casualties, but because, the king of the forest had been wounded by termites!”

“Aren’t you sorry for those who lost their lives in such a barbaric attack?” Abudu counters.

“No doubt, it was a lamentable occurrence. But I do also feel sorry for those poor women and children of Africa and elsewhere who die every day due to hunger, malnutrition and AIDS. Just imagine what the world would have been if it had united against AIDS, poverty, and hunger as it now does against terrorism.”

“Do not link 911 and the widespread deprivation in Africa caused by Africans themselves.” Abudu counters again.

“Do not also try to link 911 and the room numbers in our hospital.” The nurse retorts.

Love And Deception. Abudu Betrays Sandra

Their argument about 911 became so nasty that Sandra became nervous. She wondered why Abudu would come to visit her at the hospital only to have himself and other nurses argue about her room number. She had always believed that Abudu, who seemed to have been a well-brought-up individual, was as decorous alone as he is in public. Wasn’t he the same person who delayed Sandra’s arrival at this hospital? If he were to be so concerned about Sandra’s well-being, why didn’t he make sure that she arrived at the hospital on time to receive a timely attention?

All Sandra knows about this man is that, he has been a roué, he was immoral. Despite the fact that he is a married man, he had seduced many women and dropped them for new conquests. Sandra was his next victim. How, on earth, could Sandra have gotten herself ensnared by this dissolute man? She had only herself to blame. But how could she have resisted his friendship when he seemed to care so much about her progress, especially after her Dad, who had been a business executive, became so déclassé to the point of working as a night watchman due to adverse circumstances?

A nurse rushes in, handing over my bill, she says:

“Get ready, its time to go home.”

“I do not have money to pay this lump sum of money.” Sandra says.

“Stop pretending. Pack up, go pay your bill and leave.”

“I have no money please.” Sandra pleads.

Leaning forward, she tells Sandra:

“Do you expect me to believe you? You are such a pretty young woman that you shouldn’t have problem settling your bills. If I were half as pretty as you are, I wouldn’t be working in a hospital for just a pittance.”

As they continued to argue, Sandra couldn’t find Abudu. “May be he’s gone to settle the bills.” She consoled herself. Then she quickly hurried to the check out counter to find Abudu. With a low guttural growl, she asked the lady at the counter.

“Please where is that tall and lanky gentleman who wore a blue T-Shirt and sunglasses?”

“Do you mean the man who was lecturing us about the evils of 911?” The lady asks.

“Exactly!”

“I’m sorry, he’s left.”

“Did he say anything before leaving?” Sandra asks.

“Not that I know.”

Conclusion

At this point Sandra knew she was wrong. She was wrong in thinking that Abudu – that married man – had come to the hospital to help pay for her medical expenses. He’s now vanished into thin air!

The police officer too, who had worked so hard to pluck Sandra from Abudu’s firm grip was also no where to be found!

Sandra then began to recollect what her Dad had told her some time ago:

Beware of men who make you feel as safe and warm as a cup of cocoa with a marshmallow melting in it. But then, when you get to the bottom of the mug, you find a dead fly, and disgust replaces delight.

This writer has the firm belief in him that, countless woman might have had so many experiences with men who came on strong like Abudu and the police officer – and retreated just as vehemently! The problem is, as Sandra recalls:

Dad always lamented that, Women are experts at ignoring warning signs, even the ones so obvious.

The euphoric mood that the police officer had generated in her, and that of Abudu’s voice when she fist heard it inside the hospital, disappeared entirely. She was now left to her fate. The cashier at the counter was unemotional, impassive and excitable. She could not be easily roused. How could Sandra explain to her that she couldn’t afford to pay her bill at that moment, and would come to do that later?

One may argue that the police officer was only a stranger who happened to be performing a random act of kindness as far as Sandra was concerned. Others would think he was also attracted to Sandra. Sandra had something of the dog in her. Indeed, she radiated ethereal beauty – as if though not of this world. Abudu was known for his treachery and perfidy, how about the police officer? Why didn’t he stay beside Sandra to make sure she was alright before leaving? More so, why didn’t he come back again to find out how Sandra was doing? Was he also a married man who was too scared to cheat on his wife? We may never know.

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Free Short Romantic Love Story – Continuation

He Loved Her. But Ended Up Hurting Her Even More

Abudu sounded penitent when Sandra told him how much pain he had caused her.

“It was Abudu’s natural treachery that had finally caught up with him. He refused to let my best friend, Angelina accompany us.” Sandra says.

“He deliberately made me fail in all my French oral exams. I was really appalled at his perfidy. He had sworn to me that he would be my confidant and protector at the boarding school, and despite that, he betrayed my trust by purposefully delaying my swift transfer to the hospital.” Sandra laments.

Sandra goes on to lambaste Abudu of his perfidy:

“He seemed to have more temerity than skill or sense. He was like that mountain climber who ended up at the bottom of the heap because he tried to climb a mountain that was much too difficult for him. His tenacious effort to keep me by his side, no matter how long it took to fix his car or get a taxi earned him a bad reputation among my schoolmates – and even some of his ardent admirers. He spoke English with a lisp. No wonder some students at our school took advantage of this to mercilessly satirize him in a skit at the school talent show last semester.”

As they drive past the police barrier toward the hospital, the young officer who gave Sandra a ride cracks a conversation:

“I’m Sergeant Nelson. What’s your name young lady?”

“I’m Sandra.”

“A nice name. Who’s that man?”

“He’s my school principal.” Sandra answers with a languid drawl.

“What’s his name?”

“He’s Abudu.”

“Is he married?”

“Yes”.

“Has he any kids?”

“Yes. Three kids.”

Sandra says:

Irresponsibility And Neglect At The Emergency Department

“The car pulls over at the emergency ward. I’m visibly tired and weak. The officer helps me out of the car and walks me slowly into the main hall of the emergency ward.”

Sandra is multiracial. Her maternal ancestors were European. Her father was African.

Sandra describes the scene at a typical African hospital:

“I can see some patients sitting on the floor because all the benches are occupied. I sit down on the floor beside one old lady in her seventies. She’s bleeding. She has a cut in her right arm. Tears are flowing freely down her cheeks as she toiled to ease the pain, stop the oozing blood, and bind the wound. The pathos in the lot of patients waiting in the emergency ward is so much for me to bear.”

Sandra describes the attitude of the nurses upon her arrival:

“The nurses on duty are looking on unconcerned. Probably their minds are set on leaving the shores of Africa in the search for greener pastures abroad.” Sandra surmises.

The officer cries out.

“Why are you nurses standing and staring at us. This young lady needs immediate attention.”

“Have you paid for registration?” A middle-aged nurse with flaccid arms and legs asks.

“Of course yes.”

Taking out a lipstick and a tiny mirror from her side pocket, she retorts insolently:

“Then let her sit down over there and wait!”

Her peremptory tone of voice irritates the officer and even some of her colleagues.

“Are you here for a beauty contest or to help take care of the sick?” Sergeant Nelson asks angrily.

“It’s none of your business. Shut up over there!” She says. I’ve got a son who’s almost your age.” The nurse angrily tells  officer.

Love At A Standstill. Officer Refuses To Pay Bribe

“No, never.” The officer refuses to budge.

“Then say whatever pleases you. You risk making that your sister (or who ever she is to you) sit here till daybreak without being attended to, unless you are ready to do something”

“Do what?” It’s been three and a half hours since Abudu’s car had a flat tire. Here am I again. I’m caught up in another mess. What a bad day!” Sandra laments her plight.

“The officer is taking something out of his pocket. Is he taking out money to pay our way through? I’m wondering. He is walking toward the information desk.” Sandra is talking to her self.

“Please can I talk to the chief nurse?” The officer says.

“You can’t talk to the chief nurse. What’s your problem?” The lady sitting at the counter replies.

Showing his police badge to the lady, he says: “This is my problem.”

“Okay. She’s the one sitting over there painting her lips.” The receptionist says – pointing her index finger to the woman sitting adjacent to the main entrance.

“There are three of them painting their lips. Which of them?” The officer inquires.

“That one sitting on the right side of the door leading to the main entrance.”

“Do you mean that lady I was just arguing with?” The officer asks.

“Yes, sir, but I don’t think she knew you were a police officer.” The receptionist says with her voice shaking.

“What would she have done if she knew I was an officer?”

“She would have given you a special treatment.” The receptionist says.

“Special treatment?” What do you mean by that?” The officer asks

“I mean she would have treated you better.”

“What better?”

“She would have instructed the nurses to attend to that lady you brought in promptly.”

“So what of those sick people sitting on the floor. What’s their fate?” The officer says, pointing to the sick people on the benches.

“They’ll all soon be attended to.” The receptionists reassures the officer.

“How long will take all of these patients to get prompt attention. Is this not an emergency ward?”

“Yes it is. But…”

“But what?” The officer shouts out in anger and frustration.

“You know many people walk into this emergency ward without enough money to…”

“Without enough money to pay for registration?” The officer interrupts.

“No. Enough money to get things done for them quickly.”

“Okay. What’s her name? Are you trying to produce a watertight alibi to exonerate her from all responsibility for her conduct?” The officer asks the receptionists.

“No. But…” She’s scratching her hair. She’s unable to continue.

“Stop scratching your hair and talk to me. But what?” The officer insists.

“I don’t want to lose my job. I’m obliged to swim with the tide.”

With complacency and satisfaction beaming in her countenance, she continued:

“When in Rome, do like the Romans!”

“Don’t be silly. Do you even know where Rome is?” The officer is agitated further.

“Is Rome not the capital of Hungary, no, Austria?” “My brother even sends me money from that city.”

 

“From where?

“From Rome, in Austria!” She replies with confidence.

“You should be ashamed of your self that you don’t know where Rome is.” The officer says.

“It isn’t my business to know where Rome is, officer. After all, how many of those white men in Rome (wherever it is located, care to know where Ghana is situated on the world map?” The receptionist counters.

With a sardonic grin, expressive of disdain, she continues:

“Why is it that we have a penchant for knowing where the white man lives, what he eats or drinks, where he sleeps, and even the names of his dogs?”

“I’m very impressed about your sense of black pride. But why haven’t you translated that into eradicating the rot in this emergency ward?” The officer says.

“What rot.”

“I mean the corruption; the inefficiency; and the general apathy toward the sick.”

 

 Continued Here:

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Free Short Romantic Love Stories – In An African Setting

She was born and bred a Christian 55 years ago. Her name was Sandra.  She was of a mixed heritage. Her maternal ancestors were European. Her  father was African. She later converted to Islam and was named Layla 27. During her time in high school, she fell in and out of love several times in a year.

Sandra didn’t ever hang out with one man for more than six months. She says she was the most beautiful girl in her school and that she had a knack in engaging in hanky-panky relationships and never slept with any man unless she was convinced the man really loved her. She’d date a man for a month or two and then dump him. This was particularly the case if a man insisted during the early period of their relationship on slipping between the sheets with her.

Sandra’s First Encounter With A Married Man

Sandra’s first encounter with a married man was that with her high school principal called Abudu. Although he was married, Abudu was amorous of every pretty woman he meets. She was 17 and he was 45 with a face like granite, but had smiles that were captivating. He had five grown-up  children and knew how to behave in any company and in any situation. On the other hand, she was young, unmarried and naïve. He looked older than his age and was handsome.

It was Abudu’s wont to give lengthy speeches that were often larded with obscure quotations. Sandra considered him to be a messianic leader who showed his students the way to a better life. She would go to Abudu to seek advice on every thing, even including how to deal with guys who often harassed her because she wouldn’t go out on a date with them. Little did she realize she was being dragged into a spider’s web. He then took advantage of this young attractive and naïve girl.

He vowed to make Sandra fall in love with him, and she did. Abudu was a womanizer, and he applied his skill to the minutiae of his craft. It all started when Sandra had difficulty in adjusting to the new milieu at boarding school. And. although Abudu was the school principal, he also taught French—a subject Sandra hated most. And, although French was a required subject, Sandra failed in every French exam. Abudu made matters worse by making sure that she wouldn’t pass any of her French exams.

Being the only French teacher in the school he called the shots. Grandpa got worried about Sandra’s poor records in French and hired a private tutor. It didn’t work. Despite Grandpa’s efforts to help her get a passing grade in her French exams, she kept slipping on the banana peels of Abudu who frustrated all her efforts. Sometimes, all went well during the written examination until the oral part—which was always Sandra’s nemesis. She considered Abudu as a messianic figure and did never suspect that he was the real cause of her problems.

She Was Down With A Headache After A Volley Ball Competition

It was one hot afternoon during the dry season when Sandra came down with a severe headache after taking part in a volley ball competition, and that presented Abudu with a golden opportunity to make Sandra to get Sandra to sit in his car for the first time. His previous efforts to get her take a ride in his car had all been fruitless. This time, he offered to take her to the hospital in his rickety 45 year-old sedan.

 

At first, Sandra insisted on being accompanied by her best friend—Angelina. Abudu resisted. Assuring her that all will be well. It was during the weekend, and Sandra knew Abudu’s wife had gone to visit her parents in the village with her children.

“Sandra, I know you feel uncomfortable being alone with me in the car without your most trusted friend, Angelina.” Abudu appeases Sandra.

“Yes. I do.” Sandra affirms.

“Don’t worry, I’ll go back and fetch her after I drop you off at the hospital.” Abudu reassures Sandra

“But why didn’t you allow her to go with us in the first place?” Sandra retorts bitterly.

“I was afraid.” Abudu answers.

“Afraid of what?” Sandra sks.

“Afraid that she’ll find out why…why you’ve failed in every French oral examination.” Abudu explains.

“What has my French orals got to do with she accompanying me?”

“Now listen carefully. Ever since I…” Abudu tries explaining matters to Sandra.

“Ever since you what?” Sandra asks.

“Please, I’m really sick, and you’ve offered to take me to the hospital, and I do appreciate that. Please don’t indulge in histrionics for the moment. Leave that for another day.” Sandra tries to stop Abudu.

“Okay. I just wanted you know how much I love you.” Abudu is now being honest.

“Would you stop the car and let me get out?” Sandra is infuriated.

“No. You are sick. And I can’t leave you by the roadside under this hot sun.” Abudu tries his luck.

He Defies Orders To Stop. Then Gets A Flat Tyre

The weather was fine, and the traffic was light. Abudu was doing ninety on a wide straight road with a speed limit of 65km/h. He was spotted by an off-duty traffic police officer who gave him a good chase. Abudu had defied orders by the officer to pull up. He therefore had to call for a back up. But long before they arrived, he had a flat tire. The officer arrives. He’s in his early thirties. He’s a tall, lanky and good-looking man.

Abudu is looking nervous. Not because he’s afraid of being charged with disregarding the speed limit and also flouting orders to pull up. He’s nervous for a different reason – losing Sandra to this young man. He knows after all that, as far as breaking the law is concerned, the payment of a sum of money (bribe), linked to the gravity of the offense, will enable him get away with it. He’s done it on several occasions, and is determined to do it again this time.

“Do you realize how dangerous it is to over speed?”

“Many innocent people get killed on our roads due to what some drivers always consider to be “circumstances” that force them to…”

Abudu interrrupts:

“Officer, you can see that the girl inside the car is moaning, as pain wracks her body. I was only trying to help by… ”

The police officer also interrupts:

“By your over speeding? But you could equally have killed her by driving recklessly!”

“Ok Officer I’m sorry.”

“Sorry for what?”

The Back Up Arrives. Abudu Tries To Bribe The Officers

The back up arrives. Abudu calls one of them aside. In a geographic area where bribes and pay-offs are an accepted way to get things done, he tries to bribe him. This was an exceptionally bad day for him. These were not venal police officers. He therefore refuses to accept any bribe. One of them issues a ticket to him for over speeding and reckless driving. Sandra is standing outside the car. The off-duty police officer sees how she is toiling to ease the pain wracking her. He tries to offer Sandra a ride to the hospital. Abudu becomes fidgety. Sensing that he might not after all get to the hospital in his own car, he says:

“Officer, don’t worry, I‘ll quickly fix my car and drive her to the hospital. Abudu appeals.

“How would you do that in even two hours time? Look the girl is in real pain!” The officer cries out.

“If I’m not able to fix it soon, I’ll take a taxi.” Abudu reaasures the officer.

“Stop dreaming about taking a taxi when I’m willing to drop her at the hospital at no cost!” The officer cries out again.

“But Officer, she wouldn’t feel comfortable with you behind the wheels. You’re a stranger!” Abudu tries to convince the officer to abandon his plans.

“Why are you so heartless? Its going to take you the whole afternoon to fix this car or even get a taxi, I’ll not allow you to cause the death of this young innocent girl. I’m sending her to the hospital right away!” The officer makes a final decision.

“Officer, may I accompany you to the hospital?” Abudu makes a final appeal in a guttural voice.

“No, you’d better stay behind and take care of your car.”

Sandra In Agony While Abudu And Police Officer Decide Her Fate

Abudu was adamant. He would not let the police officer take Sandra to the hospital all by himself. He had become so infatuated with Sandra that he always drooled and gurgled whenever he was close to her. While the two men quarreled over who would take Sandra to the hospital, time went by slowly. Terseness is not one of Abudu’s virtues. He would talk until the crack of dawn if someone didn’t stop him. Twenty-five minutes has passed. The officer ignores him. He’s helping Sandra into his car. Abudu’s knees are seen knocking as he looks on apprehensively.

The officer refuses to let Abudu join them in his car, asking him to rather tend to his car and go pay his traffic violation as soon as possible. Before they speed off to the hospital, Sandra asks Abudu:

“What’s so special about you insisting on sending me to the hospital?”

“It’s because I’m responsible for your safety. I’m your high school principal.”

“My safety for God’s sake. You were over speeding until you had a flat tire. You would have equally caused my death.” Sandra gives Abudu a rap on the knuckles.

Moving toward Sandra who was seated at the back of the car, Abudu says:

“I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

The officer speeds away with Sandra at the back seat.

Continued Here:

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